The Mandate.

As Mercy UK, this is our commitment and mandate to the Church.

At Mercy UK, we recognise that many within the Church today are carrying pain that has not yet been fully acknowledged or addressed.

Through our conversations with individuals across a wide demographic, a common thread has emerged—many are navigating a deep sense of disconnection, hurt, and uncertainty in their spiritual journey.

These challenges are not isolated to individuals, but point to a broader longing for wholeness within the body of Christ.

Acknowledging the challenges

We recognise that this pain can stem from many places; grief, disappointment, strained relationships, personal struggles or abuse.

For some, it may include the effects of unhealthy or unhelpful dynamics within church settings.

For others, it may be shaped by past trauma, including Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs), or the impact of racial or cultural exclusion. Whatever the source, these experiences can leave individuals questioning their identity, their purpose, and even their understanding of God.

IT’S TIME TO LIVE FREE

We believe healing begins when we create safe spaces to process these experiences honestly, with grace and compassion.

At Mercy UK, we are committed to walking alongside those who are navigating these challenges, offering resources and support to help people rediscover their identity in Christ and find freedom and restoration.

Through intentional care, community, and Christ-centred support, we believe healing is possible—for individuals, for leaders, and for the Church as a whole.

Our commitment to individuals

Through the Keys to Freedom workbook and The Freedom Journey programme, we provide practical tools for individuals to explore the root causes of their struggles and take steps toward healing.

These programmes are designed not only to support personal breakthrough, but to encourage deeper intimacy with God, restored relationships, and renewed purpose.

Our commitment to leaders

Importantly, this need for healing is not limited to church members. Many pastors and leaders are also navigating their own internal battles—feelings of fatigue, discouragement, overwhelm, or a loss of clarity around their calling.

As fellow believers, we recognise that leaders, too, need space to heal and be restored. It is a reminder that we are all human—each of us on a journey, each in need of grace.

Our commitment to the whole church

We believe Christ is returning for a healed, whole, and unified Bride.

This means that each of us has a role to play in the restoration of the Church—not by placing blame, but by taking personal responsibility for our own growth and healing.

When we do this, we are better positioned to bring hope and restoration to others.

THE QUESTION WE MUST ALL ASK IS THIS:

Are we willing to respond to the invitation—not just to support the healing of others, but to allow God to work deeply within us too?

When we do, we contribute to the healing of the Church itself.

Mercy UK is committed to being part of this movement of healing and transformation.

Restoration is a process, not a quick fix, and we are here to walk alongside those who are ready to LIVE FREE & STAY FREE.

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ACTION POINTS

You can join this movement right here, right now!

Faith & Glimmers

Helping you navigate the tension between faith & mental health by looking at a tension point, a talking point and a truth to ponder.

Tension Point

"Life feels overwhelming right now—like I’m walking a tightrope, just trying to keep everything in balance. But I’ve noticed tiny moments that help me catch my breath... can those really make a difference?”

Talking Point 

I don’t know about you, but life can sometimes feel relentless—like an obstacle course of expectations, noise, and stress. And yet, I’ve been noticing something surprising lately: little moments that spark joy or bring unexpected calm. A slant of sunlight through the window. The feel of my dog’s head on my knee. A verse of Scripture that seems to be just for me.

Some psychologists now call these moments “glimmers”—the opposite of triggers. Where triggers disrupt, glimmers soothe. Rooted in Polyvagal Theory, they’re tiny cues that signal safety to the nervous system. They can shift us from stress into a state of calm and connection. 

And faith invites us into the same shift. The God who created our nervous systems also gifts us these moments as reminders: I am with you. You are safe. You are loved. They’re not just psychological flashes of calm; they’re spiritual nudges, drawing our hearts back to truth.

Truth to Ponder

You don’t have to wait for a big breakthrough to begin feeling better. Glimmers offer real hope—and they’re already in your day. Here’s how to start noticing:

• Name the glimmers. Keep a note in your phone or journal. What small things soothe you? A warm drink? A kind word? A certain worship song?

• Lean into them. When you notice one, pause. Breathe. Let it sink in. Let it minister to your nervous system—and your soul.

• Create space for them. Glimmers don’t always crash into our day. Sometimes we have to slow down enough to see them. Take walks, pause for prayer, watch the clouds. Simplicity is holy ground.

• Let faith frame them. Don’t just see them as happy coincidences. See them as signs—divine fingerprints of a God who is near.

• Share them. Glimmers grow stronger when shared. Text a friend the moment. Thank God aloud. Let it strengthen your community and your faith.

The more we notice glimmers, the more they grow. They tether us to hope, resilience, and joy. Like David in Psalm 23, who, in the midst of adversity, felt God leading him to quiet waters and green pastures to refresh his soul. 

So take heart. Keep looking. The glimmers are there—scientifically grounding, spiritually uplifting, and always available to those who seek them.

Post-traumatic Stress Disorder

What is PTSD?

Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is part of a response to experiencing trauma, whether repeatedly or as a one-off event. PTSD occurs when our brain’s natural actions to try to make sense of what has happened, and the emotions it has triggered, clash with our understandably not wanting to remember or relive the experience and our attempts to avoid the anxiety that memories trigger.

PTSD is typically described as three things: intrusive images or thoughts of a past event (sometimes called flashbacks), a general feeling and experience of being on edge, and an avoidance of the actual place or places similar to where the trauma happened. This best describes one-off traumas, such as assaults and natural disasters. Some people experience PTSD-like symptoms after repeated or historical traumas, like childhood sexual abuse. This may be called complex trauma or type-2 PTSD.

What causes PTSD?

We know that events out of context can cause PTSD, such as a freak natural disaster, a car crash or an assault. Adrenaline, when it is expected, does not cause trauma. (Think of an athlete at a major competition.) But when it comes as a surprise, we know it can change the way the brain works. It turns on our ‘fear’ centre (called the amygdala) and shuts down the bit of our brain that usually discriminates (called the hippocampus). As a result, we become oversensitive to stimuli or triggers that might previously have been linked with danger or trauma and we react to more things than are helpful.

We also know that the brain responds to trauma by replaying traumatic memories and emotions as it attempts to process them. If our fear of these causes us to try to repress or suppress them, we interrupt this natural process and end up in opposition to our own brain. Instead, we need to find safe methods and places where we can enable this processing to occur in a controlled way, and allow our mind to move on from what we have experienced.

People can beat themselves up when they get PTSD, often wondering why they can’t ‘snap out of it’. They may never have experienced emotions like this before and feel overloaded and out of control. Understanding the processes behind it can be an essential part of recovery. They may also struggle with feelings of guilt – for what happened or sometimes for other things, such as their having survived when others did not. Many sufferers also develop depression and can be prone to substance misuse as they try to self-medicate or control what they are feeling. 

Can it be treated?

PTSD requires a combination of approaches. Talking treatments like cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) can help moderate powerful emotions and help people feel more in control. This can better enable them to talk through and recall what happened, so the memories can be filed away like any other past events. Other therapies, such as EMDR (eye movement desensitisation and reprocessing) also aim to help people recall and process traumatic experiences whilst limiting the strength of the emotions they trigger.

In some traumas, people may need to learn skills to stabilise and manage anxiety or panic first, before looking at the event(s) in any detail. Medication can also help reduce the intensity of thoughts and emotions, making talking treatments more possible. 

What about faith?

Life is not fair – we know that from the Bible: that bad things happen to good people. When this happens, it turns our worldview on its head, and we can begin to assume it is deserved and that God is not good. We must remember the lesson from the story of the wise and foolish builders (Matthew 7:24-28): no matter how good your foundations, storms will come.

It is inevitable that tragedy will bring many questions. The Book of Job reminds us that there is far more at play than we can ever know. There are times we just need to worship God and turn our trust to him.

At its best, the Christian community is made up of people who all have questions too. Simplistic responses (often from those who have never suffered themselves) can be hurtful and wrong. Look at the advice Job got from his friends! Churches need to be supportive and non-judgemental, offering hope that things will work out in the end, but not asking the sufferer to accept this overnight. They can also help decrease isolation and loneliness.

Some spiritual exercises, like mindfulness, meditation and contemplation, are very helpful in PTSD. They allow us to focus on what matters, to be non-judging of ourselves. They allow us to approach our questions and past experiences in a measured way, meaning we can process them rather than suppress them.

Helpful Links

• To read more about PTSD see these pages from the Royal College of Psychiatrists

• PTSD-UK is the national charity for PTSD

The Mind and Soul Team

What is Bipolar?

“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit." - Psalm 34:18

Within popular culture, bipolar disorder is often glamourised. We usually see it portrayed as a condition that is associated with creativity, energy and fun; the challenges associated with it are often overlooked.

Previously referred to as manic depression, bipolar disorder is a mood disorder that is defined by the presence of depressive episodes and manic states. Mania occurs when there is a persistent elevation of the mood, usually for at least 7 consecutive days. Alongside this, there are other characteristic symptoms, including excessive spending, rapid speech, increased energy levels, a decreased need for sleep and grandiose thoughts.

Manic symptoms can also include delusional beliefs, which themselves may touch on religious themes. This does not mean that the presence of a strong faith is a sign of bipolar disorder, but rather that existing beliefs may become exaggerated, or there is a preoccupation around certain themes. In some instances, certain beliefs become deeply entrenched and resistant to any form of challenge. Understandably, this can be very invalidating for some Christians and requires a sensitive and empathic approach amongst family, friends and members of one's church community.

Whilst manic symptoms can seem to be harmless and people who are ‘high’ can be very pleasant and fun to be around, mania can cause people to take risks they would not normally take and engage in embarrassing behaviour.  Within a Christian context, it is important to contextualise any such behaviour and refrain from judgment. 

Core Symptoms

Much of the focus tends to be on manic states, but more time is typically spent in depression with this condition and the depressive episodes can be debilitating and dispiriting. The core symptoms are essentially the same ones that occur within a classic (unipolar) depressive episode e.g.the persistent suppression of one's mood, low energy levels, an inability to enjoy previously pleasurable activities, poor concentration and reduced appetite. It is typically within this context that people may experience thoughts that life is not worth living. The depressive episodes can last for weeks or months. 

Having mood swings does not constitute the presence of bipolar disorder. There is a specific pattern that occurs within bipolar disorder, best recognised by a suitably qualified mental health professional who can make the diagnosis, rather than Dr Google! 

Most mental health conditions can be thought as occurring in the context of biological, psychological and social factors. Bipolar disorder is strongly considered to be very much at the biological end of the spectrum and is known to occur more commonly in families in which there is already a person with an established diagnosis. This strongly indicates that genetic factors play a significant role in whether somebody experiences bipolar in their lifetime. It most commonly begins in mid-20s. Further episodes may be brought on by periods of significant stress or a lack of sleep.

The frequency with which episodes occur varies significantly from person to person. However, in most cases medication is required on a long-term basis to reduce the intensity and the frequency of episodes. In some cases, it is not possible to completely eliminate the presence of depressive or manic episodes, but to try and gain better control on the symptoms. 

As with any other chronic condition, these hard facts can be difficult to swallow, particularly in the realms of unanswered prayer and healing ministry.

The fluctuations from depression to mania and back again can leave people broken hearted, frustrated and questioning God. Bipolar disorder strikes at the heart of our theology concerning mental illness. 

Bipolar disorder is a condition that requires specialist assessment and treatment. If you are concerned that you or a loved one might be exhibiting symptoms of bipolar disorder, you should encourage them to contact their GP. Spiritual support can be of huge value and help to reduce the stigma associated with this condition, but must be regarded as a compliment rather than an alternative to medical intervention. 

Further information on bipolar disorder:
https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/bipolar-disorder/about-bipolar-disorder/  
https://www.rcpsych.ac.uk/mental-health/problems-disorders/bipolar-disorder 
 

Chi-Chi Obuaya, 29/04/2022

Dr Chi-Chi Obuaya is a Consultant Psychiatrist working in the NHS and in independent practice, as well as a Mind & Soul Foundation Director

Faith is a Process

“Welcome Mrs Davies, please take a seat and I will find your file on our system”

I sat there, my pulse rate increasing as the lady laid out what the government had planned for my life. Apparently, since my son had now turned three years old, I would be required to work sixteen hours per week. My husband was studying for an MSc six days a week and there were no other friends or family who could help.

“So, the government wants me to work for sixteen hours so that I can access the ‘free’ childcare scheme? Wouldn’t it be more cost-effective if I was permitted to care for my own son?”

“I do understand your perspective but I can only operate within the existing system”

I couldn’t stay much longer. The sweat and heart palpitations had morphed into tears and were threatening to do a quick exit. I thanked her, crossed the street, walked into Tesco, located the bathroom, found an empty cubicle, locked the door, and burst into tears.

”God, You led us to Home Educate our children, so why are You now forcing me to change the plan?”

***

The follow-up meeting at my local Job Centre was better - I had probably gone overboard with my Job Seekers' homework.

The one thing in my favour, despite the personal stress… was that our landlord told us he was selling the house; the beloved bungalow where we had spent the second lockdown, where my son had taken his first steps and spoke his first words, where my daughter had multiple playdates and parties.

“What is God doing? What are we doing wrong? I thought He said we would buy property, I thought He asked us to move here, I thought He asked us to Home Educate? All we do is try to do the right, best thing, we gave Him our twenties and thirties to be missionaries, so why is this all happening?”

This was the rant that Simon heard a little too often. Maybe it was a mixture of confusion, disappointment, feeling let down and fatigue that made these questions swirl around in my head, non-stop. I would fall asleep at night repeating “I do believe, forgive my unbelief”.

***

The summer of 2023 was insane. Simon had just graduated with his MSc in Counselling, with Distinction, but was unemployed because of his lack of experience. I was looking for work, but I didn’t know where we would be living. We were using all of our time and energy to pack up the house, search for rentals and make epic memories with our children.

We were exhausted.

I think it was Simon who finally stumbled across the information, which stated that being a student could count as sixteen hours of work. I was overjoyed and began looking at courses. The best course provider seemed to be the Open University, since it had the flexibility that would allow me to Home Educate both of my gorgeous children. I told a few friends about my idea to study and, to my astonishment, they both assumed that I would do Creative Writing.

They seemed so confident in my abilities and I sensed God’s hand highlighting this option. People had always told me I was a talented writer and I had accepted their compliment as being kind, but took them with a pinch of salt. My biggest fear was that the MA would expose me as a terrible writer. But I had no time to dwell on anything. I filled in the forms, sent them away and received an acceptance letter. I had to pack up an entire house, set up a new one and support my children through this emotional process. Then I could think about my studies.

***

Once established in our new rental, I looked at my course module information. I was required to select what type of Creative Writing I wanted to focus on. I had no idea! But Simon, suggested I focus on Creative Nonfiction (true stories, well told).

To be honest, even whilst doing my first assignment, I wasn’t certain what Creative Nonfiction was and my tutor had bluntly stated that “It is very difficult to obtain a Distinction so don’t focus on the grade, just focus on writing to the best of your abilities”.

My first assignment was about Intuitive Eating, an anti-diet approach to eating. I used it as an opportunity to raise awareness about this philosophy and to describe what my Eating Disorders had been like. I suppose it was a montage of my journey from Eating Disorders to being healed and whole. They awarded me a Distinction. But I still didn’t believe that I was an excellent writer; imposter syndrome (fear of being exposed as a fraud) deluded me and only after multiple Distinction results did I believe in myself and took myself seriously as a writer…

“Simon. This is what I was born to do. My whole life I have been searching for what I can be good at, trying to discover my gifts. This is it. Writing. I can’t believe that I am forty years old and only discovering this now. And isn’t God good? He provided a house with a study; He provided an option where I could still Home Educate the kids; He provided a university where I didn’t need to commute to campus - my course didn’t even have lectures, I could do it all as and when I could. And, I am really good at it. So good that my tutor has suggested I do a PhD. And there are loads of Home Educating families here, way more opportunities for the kids and tons of kids on the street that our children can play with. I know we can’t buy a house just yet, but He will provide!”

To take medication, or not, that is the question.

Angharad gives us a snapshot of her process from not taking medication, to being on prescribed antidepressants, long-term. 

I walked down from the church stage, where I had been giving a short testimony of overcoming depression…

An excited couple came up to me and asked, ‘Did you stop your medication?’ To their surprise, I gave an enthusiastic answer. ‘No, I’ve only just started taking them’. I suspect  I may have disappointed them and not met their expectations, as the idea that God could use medication to assist in the healing of mental health conditions still seems to carry a great deal of stigma.

I have often imagined myself speaking to a hypothetical church congregation and challenging them with the following debate: 

‘How many people here wear glasses or contact lenses?’

I would wait for many hands to go up, without shame. I would then ask if they would be willing to dispose of their lenses and frames; trusting God to heal their eyesight.

I will never know the real response to this imagined scenario, but I do know that it is socially acceptable, even for Christians who believe that God can heal, to wear contacts or glasses, without trusting God for a miracle. Yet, if someone has a mental health problem, we can judge the fact that they are taking medication, rather than rejoice in the brilliance of medicine to help people who suffer with poor mental health. 

My father is a scientist and I am indebted to him for raising me to see no disparity between faith and science. God is the ultimate Creator - just think of the entrepreneurship, vision, imagination and creativity required to make us and this beautiful earth. And are we not made in His image? Therefore, I see it as a fulfillment of our God-given nature that we are innovative and can come up with scientific solutions to human problems. 

I became a Christian at 23, just after my mum died. At the time of her death, I was still struggling with suicidal depression. No one has been able to explain why I developed a propensity towards depression, but the more I learn about childhood trauma, the more I see the direct correlation between the death of my brother at age 4 (my first childhood memory) and suicidal depression. I am extremely grateful to the world of psychotherapy and childhood development for shedding so much light on the reasons why losing my brother, at such a formative age, would have had such a negative impact upon my development; coupled with a family of origin that were not equipped to help me heal; parents who were dealing with their own grief and their poor decisions - compounding the disruption of my own emotional, psychological and relational development. 

God made us to be human, raised by humans and to live in a world full of other humans. None of which are perfect.

Pain is a part of life. Pain is painful. If pain cannot find a healthy outlet, it will fester and grow.

Over the years, I have received prayer at many church services, of all denominations. I have attended healing retreats; I was a resident at Mercy Ministries UK; I saw an excellent therapist on a bi-weekly basis. I would journal, make sure I got enough sleep, eat a balanced diet, belong to a Christian community, serve the marginalised of society, tithe, have quiet times, read books, fast and pray, listen to podcasts, spend time in nature, practised Sabbath rest… whatever, you name it, I did it! 

And I have no regrets. I am convinced that all of these, and some in great measure,  contributed to my maturity and healing. But, despite the fact that I had stopped trying to take my own life, the default track in my brain would frequently take me down the path of suicidal ideation; even when I battled and fought against it with all my might.. 

…eventually, my husband suggested that I call the GP.

I was reluctant, but she was lovely and prescribed me some meds. I was skeptical about taking antidepressants, convinced that they wouldn’t work and that I would have some terrible side-effects (which can be true for some medications). But, within the 3-10 day mark, I began to feel better.

After a month I began to think, ‘Is this how other people feel? Normal? Is this what I have been missing out on for all of these years? Can this too, be freedom?’ It was, and is a miracle. 

I have no shame about being on medication. I know that I know, that I know, that I continue to give my all to be free from depression and part of that freedom is having the freedom to take  medication that helps  alleviate the pain of depression. The medication has given me margin - instead of constantly surviving the depression, I can now see my therapist to talk about the root issues of my depression, so that I can experience even more healing. One day, I may not need meds anymore, but I am also OK with needing to be on them for the rest of my life….

I am now free to live my life to the fullest, just like Jesus promised. 

Faith & Counselling

Helping you navigate the tension between faith & mental health by looking at a tension point, a talking point and a truth to ponder.

Tension Point

“I’m really struggling at the moment. I’ve thought about counselling, but I just don’t know where to start. And if I’m honest, I have a strong faith and feel like that should be enough.”

Talking Points

A couple years ago, that little dreaded orange engine light popped up on the dashboard of my car. Since learning to drive, I have jumped from one old car to the next, so this was nothing new and I was worried that taking it to a mechanic would just mean an inevitable bill that I couldn’t afford. So I ignored it, hoping it would go away on it’s own.

It didn’t. A few days later I was driving home and a loud bang was followed by bellows of smoke. I popped open the bonnet to see a part of my engine in flames on the road underneath.

We can often approach our mental health like this. We see the warning signs: not sleeping properly, persistent stress or feeling extra irritable. But we don’t know what to do or what steps to take, so we pray, we try and deal with it on our own, in the hope that – in time – the lights will go off, and things will return to normal.

Prayer is powerful, undeniably. But when our car engine light shows up, while we might say a prayer, we know we should also follow this up with a professional. Someone who can pop open the bonnet, knows what they are looking for, and start any repairs before the situation gets worse. So why do we sometimes take such a radically different approach when it comes to mental health? Why do so many Christians put off the idea of counselling, thinking that their faith should be enough?

Truth to Ponder 

Like a well trained mechanic, counsellors are professionals who understand the complexities of your emotional health and can help repair it without causing more harm. 

There is Biblical wisdom in seeking out this kind of support. Proverbs 11:14 states, “Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counsellors there is safety.”

It also reflects God’s heart for healing and restoration. Isaiah 61:1 declares: “The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor… to bind up the brokenhearted.” 

Counselling is one of the many tools that God can use to bring healing and hope to His people. It’s nothing to be afraid of, although we understand it can take a tremendous amount of courage to begin the journey. The most important step we take is the very first one: admitting we can’t do it all on our own (we weren’t designed to).

Just don’t know where to start?
Perhaps you are fully aware that you need some counselling, but you just have no idea where to start. That’s understandable. It can be incredibly overwhelming when you are considering it for the first time. So start off by reading this blog post, which will guide you through the things you need to think about, what to look for, and how to make sense of the different options available.

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I think I need counselling. What now?

I think I need counselling. What now?

Like that orange engine light on your car dashboard, our emotional wellbeing can give off warning signs—perhaps you’re feeling off, facing persistent stress, or noticing recurring emotional “hiccups” that just don’t seem right.

We may hesitate to seek professional help, worrying about cost or whether it’s truly necessary. We might try to address these issues ourselves, thinking we can fix them, but without the right tools or knowledge, the risk of causing further damage is high. Trying to handle the problem on our own could lead to a much bigger breakdown.

Just as you wouldn’t trust your car to a mechanic who lacks the expertise to repair its engine, there are times you may need a counsellor who understands the complexities of your emotional health and can help repair it without causing more harm. Here’s how to find the right expert to guide you through your healing process.

Counsellor vs Psychotherapist: What’s the Difference?

Just as there’s a difference between a car manufacturer and a car mechanic, there’s a difference between psychotherapists and counsellors. While both counsellors and psychotherapists help people with emotional issues, the key difference lies in the depth of their work. Counsellors typically focus on short-term issues, offering support and coping strategies. Psychotherapists, on the other hand, work with more complex, long-term emotional or psychological concerns, exploring deep-seated patterns and trauma.

What Should I Look for in a Good Counsellor?

The most essential part of any counselling relationship is trust. A good counsellor will create a safe, empathetic space where you can be honest without fear of judgment. You should feel heard, understood, and respected. Boundaries are also important—your counsellor should maintain professionalism, showing up on time, being organised, and respecting your emotional and personal space. They should also ensure that what you share remains confidential unless there’s a serious risk to safety.

When choosing a counsellor, it’s also essential to verify their qualifications. Look for professional accreditation from recognised bodies like ACC (Association of Christian Counsellors), or BACP (British Association of Counselling and Psychotherapy), which ensure the counsellor adheres to high ethical and professional standards. You can verify these credentials on the organisations’ websites.

Are There Any Counselling Red Flags?

While most counsellors are ethical and professional, counselling is not regulated in the UK and there are a few red flags to watch for. A lack of professionalism, such as frequent lateness or disorganisation, can be a sign of poor boundaries. A good counsellor will never use coercion or pressure in any way, and this includes the use of scripture or prayer. Faith practices in the counselling room should never be used to bring condemnation or coercion. If a counsellor pressures you to continue therapy against your will or avoids being transparent about their credentials, it could indicate that they’re not the right fit. Lastly, any inappropriate behaviour, whether personal or sexual, is a serious red flag. Red flags can be reported to professional bodies such as those mentioned above, but if the issue involves illegal behaviour or serious concerns such as sexual misconduct or harm, it should be reported directly to the Police. Additionally, if the counsellor is part of a specific church or faith-based organisation, you may want to report the issue to the relevant leadership or authority within that organisation.

Is Counselling a ‘One Size Fits All’ Approach?

When it comes to counselling, many people wonder if it’s a one-size-fits-all approach, or if there’s a specific method that will work best for them. The reality is that just as every individual is unique, so too are their emotional and psychological needs. What works for one person may not be the right fit for someone else. This is why there are a variety of therapeutic approaches available—each designed to address different aspects of mental and emotional health. Finding the right type of therapy depends on factors like your personal preferences, the issues you’re dealing with, and what kind of approach feels most comfortable to you.. Here are the most common ones:

• Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT): A goal-oriented therapy that helps identify and change negative thought patterns. It’s effective for anxiety, depression, and PTSD.

• Person-Centred Therapy: This non-directive approach focuses on creating a non- judgmental, empathetic space for individuals to explore their emotions and gain deeper self-understanding.

• Psychodynamic Therapy: Looks at how unconscious patterns and past experiences shape current behaviours. It’s often used for long-term emotional healing.

• Solution-Focused Therapy: A practical, short-term approach focused on finding solutions to immediate concerns and setting achievable goals.

• Integrative Therapy: Combines various therapeutic techniques to tailor the approach to the client’s unique needs.

How Mercy UK Works With Counsellors as Part of the Freedom Journey

Our Freedom Journey is a trauma-informed, faith-based programme designed to guide participants through a process of emotional and spiritual healing - like a full MOT and Service for the Christian! As part of this programme, participants can access free-of-charge support, including counselling if needed, although we do ask for a donation or contribution towards the cost. Mercy works with a bank of counsellors and psychotherapists who support participants as part of the Freedom Journey. We take the utmost care in selecting the right professionals to support participants on this journey. All of the counsellors we work with are registered with the BACP or ACC, ensuring they meet the highest standards of practice. Additionally, all our counsellors are DBS checked and receive regular supervision from an accredited supervisor to ensure the safety and well-being of those seeking support. They also align with our statement of faith and ethical framework, offering a compassionate, faith-centred approach that complements our overall mission to support the emotional, mental, and spiritual health of individuals. So, if you have spotted that warning light in your own life, don’t ignore it. Find the support that’s right for you.

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More Christian Mental Health Resources

Discover the 𝙼𝚎𝚛𝚌𝚢 𝙻𝚒𝚋𝚛𝚊𝚛𝚢

Do I need counselling as a christian?

Proverbs 11:14 states, “Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counsellors there is safety.”

Historically, the church has always played a central role in offering counsel to individuals facing life’s challenges. The modern understanding of counselling, particularly psychological counselling, evolved in the 19th and 20th centuries with the rise of psychology as a formal discipline. However, Christian counselling has remained distinct, integrating biblical truth with psychological principles to provide holistic care.

Counselling is a powerful tool for healing, restoration, and personal growth but does the ability to counsel others come from natural talent, learned skill, or a spiritual gift?

The Bible doesn’t explicitly list the term “counselling” as one of the spiritual gifts, but Scripture does point to wisdom, discernment, encouragement, and shepherding as key gifts that align closely with the heart of counselling.

One of the most relevant passages is Romans 12:6-8, which says: “We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us… if it is to encourage, then give encouragement.”

Encouragement (or exhortation) is a foundational part of counselling—helping people find hope and strength in their struggles. Similarly, 1 Corinthians 12:8 speaks of the gift of wisdom and knowledge, both of which are vital in guiding and advising others.

Beyond individual gifting, counselling also reflects God’s heart for healing and restoration. Isaiah 61:1 declares: “The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor… to bind up the brokenhearted.” Counselling, whether through professional training or spiritual gifting, plays a role in this work of restoration.

However, while some are naturally gifted in wisdom and encouragement, counselling is also a skill that can be developed. The Holy Spirit empowers Believers with wisdom and discernment, but learning how to listen, empathise, and guide effectively is a process that can be, and should be, refined through continual professional development and accountability.

So, is counselling a spiritual gift?

Perhaps not in name, but its core elements—wisdom, encouragement, discernment, and shepherding—are undeniably gifts from God. Whether through professional practice or informal support, those called to counsel others play a vital role in bringing healing and hope and are in themselves, a gift to His Church.

Should I Pray for Forgiveness for my Mental Health Struggles?

The Bible is full of examples of people struggling with their mental health. Elijah, after a great spiritual victory, became overwhelmed and wished for death (1 Kings 19:4). David often cried out to God in anguish, as seen in many Psalms, and some of his writings in Ecclesiastes carry a deep melancholy. Paul spoke of a “thorn in his flesh” that constantly disturbed him and described the inner battle of doing what he did not want to do (Romans 7:15). Yet, God never abandoned them—He met them with grace and strength.

Many who struggle with mental health challenges wrestle with feelings of guilt, shame, or unworthiness before God.

We may wonder if our anxiety, depression, or intrusive thoughts are a form of punishment, if they make us less faithful, or if God is disappointed in our struggles...

But the Bible paints a very different picture—one of grace, compassion, and unwavering love. Psalm 34:18 reminds us, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” God does not reject those who are struggling; instead, He draws near to them with love and care. Even when our struggles make it difficult to sense His presence, He remains with us.

It’s important to remember that mental health struggles are not sinful.

Illness—whether physical or mental—is a result of living in a fallen world, not a reflection of someones faithfulness or worth. However, our struggles with mental health can sometimes lead us into thoughts or actions that cause harm to ourselves and others.

Ephesians 4:26 says, “In your anger do not sin.” While emotions like worthlessness, shame, anguish, or despair can arise in the midst of mental health battles, we are still responsible for how we respond to them. Acknowledging our struggles and seeking support can help us make choices that promote stability and healing.

God’s forgiveness is not withheld from those struggling with their mental health. However, unforgiveness—whether towards ourselves, others, or even God—can create a barrier that makes it difficult to fully receive His grace and peace.

The Bible repeatedly emphasises the importance of forgiveness, not only as something we receive from God but also as something we must extend to ourselves and others. Mark 11:25 says, “When you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.” Holding onto bitterness or guilt can weigh us down and hinder our spiritual and emotional healing and produce a state of stress in our mind and body.

As part of the healing process, it can be helpful to reflect on how mental health struggles have impacted our lives and relationships. Seeking forgiveness—for the times we have acted in ways that hurt ourselves or others—can be a significant step toward growth and restoration. This is not about condemning ourselves or apologising for having mental health struggles, but about recognising that we still have agency in our lives. Our struggles do not define us, nor do they diminish our capacity to walk in God’s grace and truth.

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Faith & Fearing Change

Helping you navigate the tension between faith & mental health by looking at a tension point, a talking point and a truth to ponder.

Tension Point

“I’ve always struggled with change and the uncertainty it can bring. But I also know this fear is stopping me from stepping out into new things and plans that God might have for me.”

Talking Point

As I write this, the sun is pouring in through the window. I can smell the warmth in the air. The birds are chirping and I can see some gathering twigs for a nest. Spring is upon us! We are officially in transition. Moving from one season to the next. 

Which brings to mind life transitions: those periods of time where you are moving from one thing to the next. Are you in one right now? Maybe you are about to get married, or you find yourself suddenly alone. Maybe you are helping a child settle into university and navigating an empty nest or maybe you’ve just had a baby and are figuring out a whole new life stage on very little sleep! Maybe you’re buying your first house, or moving house, changing your career, or retiring from one. 

Transition is hard and for many of us (myself included) that change from one thing into the next is rarely cut and dried- usually it’s messy and chaotic. Transition can be exhausting, mentally and emotionally difficult to navigate, and it can make us feel out of control and anxious. We feel vulnerable, overwhelmed, afraid and unsure of ourselves. 

The temptation then, is to resist transition, try to ignore it, or rush through it as quickly as possible and try to regain a sense of control and order.

But nature teaches us that transition is a necessary part of the life cycle. Transition and change are beautiful in the same way that a tree moving from Summer to Autumn, with its mix of colours is beautiful. Nature teaches us that transition is vital for growth and for bearing fruit, it also teaches us that what may look like an ending, is in fact a new beginning.

Truth to Ponder 

If you’re finding yourself in a transitional life stage-a season of change right now, then here are some key things that can help you cope:

1. Embrace the change. Accept that change and transition are a normal part of life’s cycle. Make your peace with the fact that Change is here to stay.

2. Expect to feel uncomfortable. It’s not a sign that you’re not coping, it’s just discomfort. Learn to find comfort on an uncomfortable journey.

3. Set your sights on the outcome. What is on the other side of this transition? New opportunities? New relationships? More time, more purpose? 

4. Take care of yourself along the way. Don’t just get your head down and push through the season of discomfort. Look up every now and then, breathe, take in your surroundings. Learn to identify and express your feelings. 

5. Access your support system. Friends, church community, neighbours, family- don’t be afraid to ask for help. Communicate your need for company, someone to talk to or relax with, whilst you adjust to your new season. 

6. Get closure. One of the most effective ways of setting you up for what’s next is by deliberately letting go of what was. Feel the sad feelings that come with letting go, and allow yourself the luxury of goodbye.

7. Hold on to the One that is Unchanging. The bible tells us that God is the same yesterday, today and forever. He is the beginning and the end and every season change that leaves us feeling unstable, insecure and without an anchor is best lived with Jesus at the centre of it.  

If you are struggling with a life transition, if you can’t seem to get a grip on yourself, then grip on to Jesus. Hold on to Him and He will be your anchor (Hebrews 6:19). He will help you take the next step, and then the next from whatever season you’re in that is ending, into the next season full of hope and possibility. 

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Self Reflection Blog

Click here to learn more about ourselves in the varying seasons of life

Can faith help in overcoming addiction?

Addiction is a complex and often painful struggle, affecting not only the individual but also their loved ones.

Whether it’s substances, behaviours, or even thoughts that keep us trapped, the battle against addiction can feel overwhelming. But what does God say about addiction? Does He turn away from those who struggle to break free? How does God offer hope and freedom?

The Bible never shies away from the reality of human struggles, including addiction. Scripture acknowledges the pull of sin and destructive habits. Even the Apostle Paul in Romans 7:15 describes the frustration of that inner tug of war against the pull of destructive habits, “I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do”.

But the Bible also speaks of God’s power to redeem and restore. John 8:36 reminds us, “So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.” God’s heart is always for freedom to become part of our story, and often, this begins by acknowledging that addiction itself, comes with a backstory that is often key to our healing.

Addiction can often be rooted in pain, trauma, or a deep longing for something to fill an emptiness inside.

This goes some way in explaining why breaking free from addiction is not just as simple as ‘stopping the behaviour’ or receiving the prayer-line encounter. Even when we do experience God’s love or healing touch, we know that breakthrough requires walk-through and staying free requires discipline and determination.

This often involves getting to the root of our addictive behaviours and allowing God to heal the pain we can finally face so that we can live free and stay free. The Bible teaches that only God can truly satisfy our deepest needs.

Psalm 107:9 says, “For he satisfies the thirsty and fills the hungry with good things.” The things we turn to for comfort or escape can never offer lasting peace, but God’s love and Presence can. God doesn’t condemn those struggling with addiction—He calls them to healing. Romans 5:8 tells us, “But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” His love is not conditional on our ability to fix ourselves; He meets us in our brokenness and walks with us toward wholeness.

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Faith & Disappointment

Helping you navigate the tension between faith & mental health by looking at a tension point, a talking point and a truth to ponder.

Tension Point

"I’ve just received news that is absolutely devastating. But when I talk to other Christians about it, I don’t feel comfortable talking about how disappointed I am."

Talking Point 

Let's start with a definition. Disappointment is“the feeling of sadness or displeasure caused by the defeat of one's hopes or expectations”. And my goodness, doesn’t life have a lot of potential for our hopes and expectations being dashed?! Jobs we don’t get, unwanted bills we do get. Friends and family that let us down and dreams that blow up.

So when disappointment comes knocking, and enters our world uninvited, what do we do? As Christians, are we in danger of being too quick to escape this unwanted feeling?

It might sound like an odd question. After all, no one wants to stay feeling disappointed for longer than necessary. Which is why we can be so quick to say things like: “this door has closed, but it’s ok, God will open another”, both to ourselves and to others. And while there is truth in that, are we risking something by trying to jump over disappointment rather than journeying through it?

In his book 'Management of Disappointment', author Abraham Zaleznik says that two things are required to deal with disappointment in a healthy way: 1) we need to be aware and understand our emotional reactions and 2) we need to face the disappointment directly. Are we doing this if we try and bypass our emotions and declare God's promises, no matter how true they are?

How do we face our disappointment head on and deal with it healthily and faithfully?

Truth to Ponder

Here are some really practical ways (four Gs!) to disable the power of disappointment:

Grieve
Let yourself be sad, process your disappointment in a way that’s helpful to you. Journal it, talk to someone you trust about it. Cry, be selfish and ungrateful and immature without justifying it or apologising for it or trying to tidy it up. Just let what you are disappointed about have its voice. Be it a day or a week, give yourself the time you need to feel it. But, put a timescale on it. Don’t let it linger. Rein it back in and then start bringing some direction to your feelings.

Gratitude
Deliberately bring to mind some things you are grateful for. Friends, family, loved ones, a job, breath in your body, a roof over your head, a sunny day. We all have things to be grateful for. Speak them out, thank God for them. Write a list and stick it on your fridge, on your kettle, in your downstairs toilet, wherever! 

Generosity
Be generous. Make your life about more than you. Give someone a smile for no reason, give to charity, sponsor a friend’s fundraising event, go through your wardrobe and give stuff away to a charity shop. Leave a kind comment on someone’s facebook post, give a compliment to a stranger. Give time to go and help your neighbour clear his garden or collect their wheelie bin. Just doing something, anything, to direct your attention away from yourself is good for you. Disappointment doesn’t thrive in the arena of generosity towards others.

God
If you know God, then make this number one. Start there. Start with pouring out your heart to Him. Let Him bring comfort where it hurts, speak hope where hope seems lost. Worship Him, lift your eyes from the unmet desires and hopes surrounding you to the eternal perspective of the One who holds you, has gone before you and knows the end from the beginning. Your disappointments will disperse like wisps of smoke in the presence of His love, His Goodness and His Mercy. And if you don’t know God, then start there. Get to know Him. Invite Him in. Disappointment doesn’t stand a chance in the presence of the very essence of Hope.

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Faith & Anger

Helping you navigate the tension between faith & mental health by looking at a tension point, a talking point and a truth to ponder.

Tension Point

"I try and suppress my anger, because it feels like such an un-Christian emotion. But I feel like I’m about to explode 😡"

Talking Point

Anger. It just feels like such an un-Christian emotion, doesn’t it?! One that we often categorise alongside other behaviours that we consider to be ‘sinful’, or not what God intended. But anger itself isn’t a sin—it’s a natural human emotion. Ephesians 4:26 says, “In your anger do not sin.” That means feeling anger isn’t the problem; it’s what we do with it that matters.
 
When handled well, anger can actually help us recognise injustice, set healthy boundaries, and even motivate positive change. But if suppressed and not listened to anger can materialise in unexpected ways. When we don’t allow ourselves to express and process our anger, it can become internalised and cause a lot of damage beneath the surface. It can manifest as self-criticism, bitterness, resentment or self-hatred.
 
But we tend not to think about the internal consequences of suppressed anger. And maybe that is because, somewhere along the line, we’ve come to believe that suppressing it is actually the right thing to do. Anger as an emotion can be incredibly destructive if we let it take over, and many reading this will have been on the receiving end of unhealthy and unresolved anger.

So, how do we balance these things, and handle anger in a way that aligns with our faith?

Truth to Ponder 

It’s important that we are honest about our anger. Pay attention to why this emotion is surfacing for us – what are the underlying values, beliefs or circumstances we’ve held – because understanding what is behind the raw emotion is key to it being a healthy part of our emotional tool box.

Anger is a big issue that often has complex roots. But here are a few ways in which we can help find the right balance between being aware of our anger, but not letting it become destructive:
 
First, pausing before reacting is key. Count to ten, take a deep breath, or step away from the situation. Proverbs 29:11 says, “Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end.” Giving yourself a moment to process your emotions can prevent you from saying or doing something you’ll regret. Physical activity—like taking a walk, exercising, or even writing down your thoughts—can also help release that built-up tension in a healthy way. This will help you to not just ‘feel’ the anger, but begin to understand the anger. To unpack the ‘why’ behind anger, you may find it helps you to speak to a counsellor, or study the ‘Keys to Freedom' workbook.
 
Prayer and reflection can play a huge role, too. Bringing your anger to God—whether through prayer, journaling, or simply sitting in silence—allows you to process it with His guidance. Psalm 10 is a great biblical example of how to do this.

Many find that praying for the person who hurt them (even when it’s the last thing they want to do) helps shift their perspective. Forgiveness doesn’t mean excusing bad behaviour, but it does free you from the burden of resentment. For some hurts though, this is an incredibly difficult thing to consider.
 
At the end of the day, anger is part of being human. So it's ok to feel anger, but it doesn’t have to control us. By recognising our triggers, responding with wisdom, and leaning into our faith, we can learn to express anger in a way that leads to healing rather than harm. Instead of seeing anger as something to be ashamed of, we can use it as an opportunity to grow, set boundaries, and seek God’s peace in the midst of it all.

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Faith & Low Self Esteem

Helping you navigate the tension between faith & mental health by looking at a tension point, a talking point and a truth to ponder.

Tension Point

"I guess I believe that God loves me. In the way a parent loves a child, no matter what they do. But that doesn’t change how I feel about myself: a failure, a disappointment."

Talking Point

The chances are, if you have signed up to these emails, you believe that God loves us. It’s a message that is central to the Bible and everything Jesus said and did. But believing that and allowing it to increase our sense of self-esteem – how we view ourselves and our sense of worth – can be hard. Both our theology and life experience can complicate things:
 
Theologically we can believe that God loves us and struggle with low self-esteem. After all, it almost feels like a biblical view, right?! We can convince ourselves that our low self-esteem is actually just humility and low self-esteem can lead to whole-hearted appreciation that God loves us despite our failures. For those of us who struggle with a very low sense of self, this idea that God loves us 'despite ourselves' can confirm our worst fears: we ARE a failure and a disappointment, to those around us and to God.
 
And maintaining a healthy self-esteem in the messiness of life is hard! Our sense of self and worth is so easily impacted by circumstances and the people around us. This starts at a very early age in our development, whether through parents, community, peers, teachers, or whoever we engage with in the world. As social creatures we soak in the opinions, comments, nuances of body language and behaviours of other people- whether we realise it (consciously) or not (sub-consciously) and it all builds up a picture within us of who we really are.

There are two truths we need to grapple with here:

1. God thinks you are awesome. The bees’ knees. Beautiful, strong and priceless.

2. Our life experiences often lead us to find it really hard to believe that concept.

Truth to Ponder 

The Bible is full of verses that give us a glimpse into how God sees us, which we can declare over ourselves:

You ARE beautiful (Psalm 139:14), a delight (Psalm 147:11), indestructible (John 6:51) and valuable (Luke 12:24). In fact, we have prepared a list of 301 of these that can become your own personalised declarations. Just visit our Self-Esteem blog here and scroll right down to the bottom.
 
Can God’s word re-shape our thinking and sense of self? Absolutely! Can His Word tear down things we think about ourselves that aren’t true? 100% yes! But to allow those truths to heal and take precedent over our life experiences takes a journey.

It can take a lot to unpick how our life experiences and the opinions of others have shaped our own sense of self. God invites us into this journey, not by slapping us with His Word but by gently encouraging us to explore why we don’t believe it, to notice and to encounter Him as we encounter ourselves. Find out more below.

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Faith & Darkness

Helping you navigate the tension between faith & mental health by looking at a tension point, a talking point and a truth to ponder.

Tension Point

“I know I should be a beacon of ‘Hope’, but to be honest, the world just feels so bleak at the moment. I feel overwhelmed with the darkness in the world every time I read the news. And I don’t have the energy to summon up any positivity”

Talking Point 

It feels like we are living in especially dark times. Collectively and individually we seem to be facing threats from all sides. Climate change, cost-of-living, war, famine. Our planet is groaning and people are suffering. Some of these things can feel far away. Some of them are happening on our doorsteps and in our homes.

With world news at our fingertips, we are aware of the scale and level of suffering on a scale no other generation has had to navigate. Against such a bleak backdrop, it can be easy to feel lost and overwhelmed. The darkness can feel terrifying. 

And as Christians we can feel the pressure to radiate positivity, to be the ‘hope’ in a world that feels hopeless. But how on earth are we meant to summon up that kind of positivity when we feel so powerless to change the challenges in our own lives, let alone the problems in the world?!

Our hope comes from two things:
1. Understanding that light penetrates the darkness. Every time.
2. Understanding that our light source comes from a source beyond ourselves.

Truth to Ponder 

Light wins. Every time.
Have you ever stayed somewhere quite remote, away from the ever present glow of street lights and neon signs? When the sun fades, the darkness creates a sea of black, robbing everything of colour and texture. But then you look up! And the sheer quantity and brightness of the stars takes your breath away.

You see, no matter how dark it can get, the smallest of light can penetrate it. We often talk about the ‘battle between light and dark’. But it's an unfair contest. Light wins every time.

Another light source
‘That may be good and well,’ I hear you say, ‘but when I’m going through a dark time, summoning ‘light’ is so much easier said than done’. And you’d be right. In the face of some darknesses, trying to summon up positivity from within is just too impossible a task. Which is why we need to draw upon a different light source.

“In John 8 Jesus tells us “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.” ”

Following Jesus means you have a light that shines in and through you – a light that cannot be stifled by dark times and difficult circumstances because it isn’t your light, it’s His.

So look up. As hard as it is, take your eyes off everything that is weighing you down, trying to scare you, confuse you, make you feel like you can’t see the way ahead. Look to the One who set the stars in the night sky, the One who is called the bright Morning Star, the eternal light bringing hope and healing.

Easier said than done?

We know this can be easier said than done. Believe us. We have journeyed with people travelling through unimaginable darkness and distress. So if it’s a truth you are struggling to grab hold of, reach out to someone who can help as this can be hard to do by yourself sometimes.

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Faith & The Weather

Helping you navigate the tension between faith & mental health by looking at a tension point, a talking point and a truth to ponder.

Tension Point

"I know God should be my source of strength and stability, but my sense of wellbeing feels as temperamental as Autumn weather!"

Talking Point

My family and I recently spent a glorious couple of weeks on the Norfolk coast. The weather did not disappoint: apart from one drizzly day, the majority of our time was spent on the beach, hunting for sea glass, eating chips and giving in all too easily to the constant requests for ice-cream. 

Now, I know true happiness is not found in something as fleeting as a sunny day and yet, with that warm glow on my face, the gentle breeze and the sound of kids having fun with the simple pleasures in life, I must admit to feeling… well… happy.

But those memories are fading faster than the leaves can fall from the trees. Gentle breezes are replaced with bitter autumnal winds; simple pleasures have given way to the busyness of life. It’s easy to find ourselves reminiscing about the sunshine, and those simpler days where joy seemed so much easier to grasp hold off.

It’s at times like this where we realise how easy – but unstable – it is to build an internal sense of happiness on external factors.

A good job, a significant other, a sunny day.  Whilst these factors are all indeed ‘happiness’ inducing, they can never become the basis on which we build our lives. They are all changeable, like the weather.

We have to come to a place in ourselves, where our internal weather system is set, not by what is happening (and ever-changing) on the outside but by what we have cultivated on the inside.  We must find an anchor for our soul - a sense of security, identity and purpose that has its foundations firmly rooted in an unchangeable truth.

Truth to Ponder

“I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. I can do everything through him who gives me strength.”

— Philippians 4:12-13

The ‘him’ Paul refers to is Jesus. He is the constant, He is the Son and so He shines whatever the weather of your life. This doesn’t mean that when it rains in life, we have some magic ability to stay dry and not be affected. No – what it means is He gives us His umbrella and so whilst we may be facing the same conditions as everyone around us, our internal weather system is set on Him and our warmth comes from the inside out. We stay dry when we make use of what God has made available for us to use in the event of a storm; peace that isn’t dependant on circumstances, joy that becomes our strength, love that casts out all fear…

Life is unpredictable, people are fallible, things are breakable. But in Him and with Him you can find that a sunny disposition comes from a deep internal sense of being chosen, loved and living on this earth with a purpose to fulfil.

No matter what the weather is doing- you always take that truth with you so it becomes your steadfast anchor in a life that is as changeable as the weather.

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Faith & Tough Feelings

Helping you navigate the tension between faith & mental health by looking at a tension point, a talking point and a truth to ponder.

Tension Point

"When I feel depressed, angry or sad, God feels distant. I would be so much closer to God if my feelings didn’t get in the way."

Talking Point

As followers of Jesus, when we feel low, depressed, or despondent, we don’t exactly believe we are at the top of our faith game do we?! The more we experience those tough feelings, the more distance creeps in between us and God.  It can sometimes seem like we would be better Christians if we just remained joyful always (whilst ignoring feelings on the inside). 

It’s helpful to recognise that feelings haven’t always had a good reputation in the Christian faith. The things people might say (e.g. "Don't be upset, God will work all things out for good!") can come from good intentions, recognising that feelings won’t always lead us to truth. But it can give us the impression that God and feelings don't really mix. 

Aside from that, there are so many reasons why feelings such as anger or sadness (to name a couple), are often unwelcome visitors. Our human experiences can shape how we view God. For example, if we weren’t allowed to show those emotions when we were young, if we were told off for them, or even punished for them, it will likely translate that God isn’t a fan of those emotions either, or of us when we feel them. 

Truth to Ponder

But what if faith and feelings were created by God to co-exist? The human and the holy? God himself consistently endorses and displays emotions – the whole spectrum of them. 

What if in those moments where God seems so far away, we were able to cling on to the truth that God is with us and that He is not angry, ashamed or disappointed in us for having those human emotions? What if, instead, He is actually most present, most kind, most willing for you to share those tough feelings with him, as he gently holds them like precious jewels in his hands.

The Bible tells us that ‘The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit’ (Psalm 34:18)

Could we possibly allow ourselves to imagine or believe that in those tough moments, our God might be sitting directly in front of us, with empathy written on his face and hands outstretched to offer comfort and reassurance that he is not going anywhere and that we are loved through it all.

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Faith & Authenticity

Helping you navigate the tension between faith & mental health by looking at a tension point, a talking point and a truth to ponder.

Tension Point

"I want to live an authentic life – free to be me – but I often think I have to put on a brave face. I don’t see it as faking it necessarily, but showing people how good God is and being positive.  I might be hurting or angry inside, but I want to push through and be faithful. "

Talking Point

It's so easy to build up an idea of a ‘good Christian’, especially when others rely on us. We are committed to sharing our faith with others by living a life that leads by example; one of faith, showing who God is. But let's be honest, for some of us that can feel like it comes with a heavy weight of expectation. 

Do we really feel able to show our weaknesses, struggles and failures as well as our answered prayers and hilltop moments – because surely those moments are the epitome of knowing Christ?

But what if those times of authenticity and realness are actually what God desires most for us – both for us to live freely and for us to be able to relate to him totally honestly?

Truth to Ponder

When we’re busy being who we think God wants us to be, we forget what Jesus values the most – for us to be like little children (Matt 18:3). The beauty of children is that they rarely have a filter. My youngest daughter is very comfortable asking Jesus questions about his preference of pet, whether he was ever bald (that one gets asked a lot), or if he plays the ukulele. 

A glimpse of the Psalms can be mind blowing when we realise what David was actually comfortable saying to God (examples taken from The Message version):

• “I'm feeling terrible. I couldn’t feel worse”

• "Punch those bullies in the nose!”

• “You've ignored me for long enough”

• “You walked off and left us – how could you do that?”

• “God treat me nice for a change”

• “Because of you I look like an idiot”

• “You won't embarrass me will you?”

Maybe it’s time to become aware of beliefs you may have about what a ‘good disciple’ looks like and bring them honestly to God, expectant that he is very comfortable with our questions and doubts, and loves to help us wrestle through them. 

David also shares in the Psalms why he is so open with God:

“God rewrote the text of my life when I opened the book of my heart to his eyes”

— Psalm 18:24

What might it feel like to be totally yourself, alongside the knowledge that there’s nothing you can do to make you more pleasing and wonderful to him? That the living God dwells in you, desiring to continue the process of sanctifying you himself and therefore you can not fail?

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Faith & Burnout

Helping you navigate the tension between faith & mental health by looking at a tension point, a talking point and a truth to ponder.

Tension Point

“I’m burnt out, but I’m a church leader and feel like I’m meant to be the strong one. I know I should reach out, I just really don’t want to be a burden.”

Talking Point

There are so many reasons we don’t reach out for help, but one of the most recurring things we hear is “I don’t want to be a burden”. Often this reason is coupled with another inner narrative: we believe we are meant to be the strong one. The person other people rely on. The carrier of burdens, not the giver of them.

This is a noble notion, but here is the harsh truth: it’s misguided, misinformed and (I hope this doesn’t sound too dramatic) dangerous. It is a short-cut to burnout and breakdown.

Put your own oxygen mask on first.

When was the last time you were on a plane?! Before every flight, you will hear this very important piece of safety advice: put on your own oxygen mask before helping anyone else. Doesn’t sound particularly heroic, does it?! Surely we are meant to jump to the aid of those struggling, whatever the cost?!

But it’s the opposite. The BEST chance you have of helping those around you and ‘not being a burden’ is to make sure your own mask is attached. Without it, you are no help to anyone.

Not taking care of yourself, can mean you begin to experience burnout, stress, fatigue, reduced mental effectiveness, health problems, anxiety, frustration, inability to sleep, and compassion fatigue.  

Are you experiencing some of those symptoms today?

Truth to Ponder

Is it time to put on your own oxygen mask? If you're holding out on seeking support because you are worried about being a burden, you need to take a few moments to think about this: those people you are trying to protect DESERVE to have you at your best! 

Even Jesus needed to practice self-care.

In Mark 6:31 Jesus and the disciples are exhausted, so he suggests they take themselves off to a quiet place to get some rest.

Why? Because we can’t give what we don’t have. So making sure we are stocked up emotionally, mentally, physically and spiritually for the demands of the people and circumstances around matters.

Top Tips
Here are a few ways you can take care of yourself today:

1. Stop feeling guilty that you’re taking the time you need to take care of yourself.

2. Stop making yourself so available all the time and learn when to put your phone away, set boundaries.

3. Carve out time to do the things you want to do, not just the things you should, could, must, ought to do.

4. Be deliberate in fuelling your body with healthy food.

5. Exercise more. Your body needs to be fit for purpose and the endorphins will make you feel better.

6. Learn to process. Journal, sing or chat things through with someone you trust.

7. Pray. Connect with God, the source of strength, hope, joy, peace and energy that is never ending, always available and divinely effective. In Matthew 11:28-30 Jesus urges us to 'learn from me, my yoke is easy and burden is light.'

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Christianity 🤝 Mental Health

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